Perhaps because I am a native of Alabama, I am not an expert on haute couture (French for “expensive clothes.”) But this week I was invited to be a style critic at the men’s fashion shows being held in Manhattan. Generally, people in Alabama don’t speak much about the garment- design business. After all, the […]
The world of fashion is a scary place Read More »
As your New York City columnist, I had to ask myself some pretty difficult questions this week. Boy, it was a big news week. Let’s see here: the Super Bowl, the pope was in Cuba, Iraq defied the United Nations and it looks like we may go to war, a bomb went off in Birmingham,
Grandmama could handle Bill Read More »
This is my last column. Why you ask? Because I have just won $10 million from Publisher’s Clearing House, and if you poor saps think I’m going to sit on my patootey, week after week, and write columns about grits and Moon Pies, well you obviously don’t know JACK about being a millionaire. After all,
The lucky lottery winner Read More »
What I want to know is how Khartoumians meet one another without getting arrested? Does the minister say “I now pronounce you husband and wife. You may kiss the barrier.”?
I have trouble dating as it is, thank you very much. I don’t need my blind dates to be any blinder.
We have a lot to be thankful for in America Read More »
Football. I’ll bet I just doubled my readership by beginning with that word. If you were born in the Great State, the mighty pigskin is a part of your consciousness. Alabamians are fond of the game in the same way that the Hindenburg was a balloon. It was the last few minutes of the Iron
Yankees just don’t get Iron Bowl Read More »
Last night I witnessed a distinguished group of elderly ladies suddenly disintegrate into babbling, wide-eyed, blithering idiots. “OOOH!” the women said, “oodle, oodle, cha-cha-cha-cha, figgidy, figgidy, blurp!” It was a sad moment. All of us watched as some cupped their hands over their faces for a few seconds, only to emerge with stricken looks of
Babies bring out strange behavior Read More »
Normally, I devote this column to those things that have made this county great, things that make you proud to be an American, things that Norman Rockwell might have painted had he ever gotten around to it, things like Jell-O and Moon Pies. But today, gentle reader, I write not of things that make
Problem with France is the French Read More »
When I opened the rusty-white door to the Frigidaire, what seemed like a thousand watts bashed me in the eyeballs in the late night of a South Alabama summer. Arm over my eyes, I groped around using my keen sense of feel to try to locate a Co-Cola. Squinting only to find that I was
Columnist vs. roach battle ensues Read More »
I am about to devote an entire column to something I know is probably on your mind right now. A subject that is pressing on the cerebral cortex of Andalusians everywhere: New Hampshire. In pursuit of the “good life” and the Great American Dream, I recently sallied forth into that expanse of wild country, that
New Hampshire motto sparks questions Read More »
It’s hard to believe, but one of America’s silliest foods is a billion dollar industry. It’s even harder to believe the various food items that are routinely mixed with Jell-O. Many Jell-O recipes sound like what’s left over after you defrost the refrigerator and find food you haven’t touched since the last presidential administration.
Southern Jell-O recipes Read More »
